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Alien Conspiracies

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I Don’t Want To Believe

It seems like anymore all the History Channel ever shows is nothing but history. I sit down after a long day of programming and want to watch documentaries about the civil war and Modern Marvels episodes about shovels, but no, there’s marathon of Ancient Aliens followed by UFO Files. If I really wanted to buy into the crazy idea, that aliens came down thousands of years ago and gave the Mayans super secret calendar knowledge, I’d just watch Jesse “the body” Ventura’s crack pot hour.

People also get really carried away with explanations for cow mutilations and black helicopters. Why are we so quick to come up with some crazy explanation for a cow being stripped of it’s meat. Cows are delicious. Black is a cool color for anything, if I had a helicopter I’d paint it black. I’m pretty sure batman has a black helicopter and he doesn’t get blamed for strange phenomenon.

So this week is an explanation for alient phenomenon that’s just as believable as anything “the body” has to say.

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