News from January 2012

Bond-a-thon

Jan 04, 2012

James Bond has seen some action in his day. I spent a lot of time over the holidays watching the varios Bond-a-thons, and it never ceases to amaze me how many separate women he sleeps with in a movie.

The rules for getting boned by Bond are as follows.

1. If Bond sexes up an agent that’s sent to report on him or assist him in travel, she’ll be dead within 15 minutes.

2. If Bond sleeps with an A or B list actress not on the poster, she’ll be the villain or the villain’s girlfriend. Bond will wind up killing her personally.

3. If Bond bones a cocktail waitress or massage therapist who only smiles and responds to his cheesy pick up lines, she’s safe.

4. If Bond bangs Moneypenny, it’s a dream sequence or a virtual reality training simulation.

Nathan

Meow

Jan 11, 2012

I always see these really scathing and inflammatory remarks on the internet and think about the kind of person that posts them. I always think of some extremely calm, and fat, person in a dark room just sitting still and emotionless typing shit you wouldn’t read in a mens room. I also think that anything internet related should have cats.

Nathan

Delicious Family

Jan 18, 2012

I think that giving everyday foods some kind of touching family story is funny to me, I don’t quite no why. I just had this image in my head of a slab of pork and a loaf of bread reminiscing about raising their son the hotdog.

I was short on time today, so food ideas are always awesome because drawing food is super quick and I can execute when I have tons of work to do.

Nathan

Every Skating Game Ever

Jan 25, 2012

This is my recipe for success for every game ever, find a strategy with the greatest reward with minimal risk. The first game I really honed this whole process in was the Tony Hawk Pro Skater demo on PS1. There was this exact setup of half pipes and upper rails above the pipe. After listening to the two audio tracks and playing constantly for days I figured out a fun little exploit. With Tony Hawk games, every 180 you spin gives you another x1 multiplier, so the more you spin in a combo the greater the magnitude of points you can get. There’s also a point total for every trick you do and a constant point value per second while grinding a rail. Put this all together in to one constant whirling and spinning chain and you will soon get a X24 multiplier and if you do a quick grab trick while spinning you’ll get an insanely high score with minimal risk and effort.

Nathan